Maison Bertaux

Everyone has been raving about Soho's Maison Bertaux since... forever (they've been around since 1871). And well, it sounded perfect. French, vintage decor, yummy cake and awesome tea. And apparently just enough charm for you to forgive its imperfections. But as charming as it was, I haven't forgiven its imperfections. And there were a lot of them.

I had such high hopes when I arrived. It is cute! It's adorable in fact! I was excited and hunted for a table. Or course there were none (it's very very tiny) so I shivered outside while I waited for me friend. And then spotted the little side seating area. Which is completely separate to the rest of the cafe. And unfortunately has all the charm of a train station waiting room.

But the cake would make everything better, right? Cake makes everything better. Especially when it's raining. I plumped for an apple crumble pie. Pie, with crumble topping!? Yes please! What a wonderful idea. Unfortunately, my crumble pie was left with a stringy layer of uncooked pastry underneath it. I know that sometimes happens with apple pie (Miss Cay, how do we make perfect apple pie?), but I couldn't eat it. My friend's chocolate mousse cake was much better, but I was still annoyed that my cake was rubbish.

Tea was yummy. In fact I'd say that this was the best part of my trip. But being squished in by the door, and right next to another table meant that half of it went over the table. Apologising for elbowing people in the head every two minutes, or having to move because someone wants to get out does not make for a relaxing time. Service was OK, but other people have found them very rude.

Maybe I'd have enjoyed it more if we'd been in the main cafe. Maybe I could forgive them for my cake being rubbish and it was just bad choosing on my part. But £13 for two slices of cake and two pots of tea? They might be a London institution, but I'm anything but impressed.

Flickr image from Annie Mole's photostream. The shop at Maison Bertaux is no more, but if you want to find it (and indeed check out more reviews) here's a link to our friends at Qype.

An apple a day

You know the old saying 'an apple a day keeps the doctor away'. Well, in these winter months, I need all the help I can get to avoid a dreaded cold. Luckily, interior designers seem to have been feeling fruity lately and apples are everywhere. Here are five treats for your home (one for each weekday) that are bound to ap-peel.

Look at this apple rug by Michelle Mason. It costs £98 from Bodie and Fou. Made from 100% felt they say it's perfect for a kids room. At that price and that cute, I say it's perfect for me.

In a dream world I'd recline on this apple cushion from Couverture.

The cutaway detail on the back alone should justify its price tag of £179.

Priced much more in the realm of reality is this fab retro style apple storage set from Next. For just £32 you get handy tins for your bread, tea, coffee, sugar and, very importantly, biscuits.

Or for something else that combines practical and pretty, try John Lewis' PVC Pomme tablecloth. Wipe clean and cut-to-fit, your mother would be so proud. Two metres of the stuff costs £19.50.

Finally I had to include this £10 apple mug, particularly because it's made by the brilliantly named Alice Apple.

Phew! Time to sit back to enjoy a tasty apple martini and let all that fruit work its magic...

Cocktail Hour: The Amber

I've been a big fan of The Amber for a while now. But I've only ever found the apple-y ginger goodness in one bar (the rather excellent Fluid bar in Farringdon). I've been pretty much addicted to them since and as I discovered on my birthday, they're don't get you absolutely trollied. They're a long drink so you can pace yourself. Which means that I still have a pretty good memory of my party. But, I'm guessing the measures for this cocktail as I've always been slightly tipsy when I watch the bar staff make it - you might need to play about with the measures slightly.

You'll need these things:

• 50ml bison grass vodka
• 25ml apple schnapps
• 1tsp minced ginger
• Apple juice
• Ice - cubes and crushed

Make it!

Shake the ingredients together and pour over ice cubes in a tall glass. Top wish crushed ice and garnish with a slice of root ginger or apple. Sip, dance about and look silly.

Flickr image from vieux bandit's photostream.

Cocktail Hour: Apple Martini

Alright, so the purists amongst you will insist that this isn't a real martini, but you know what? Apple martinis are yummy so I don't care. As long as they taste nice and come in a martini glass (the prettiest of all cocktail glasses) then who cares what's in it? Oh, right, you do. Well then here's the recipe:

You'll need these things:

• 25ml vodka
• 25ml apple juice (apple schnapps will make this drink a bit too sweet for my taste, but if you want to use it, who am I to stop you?)
• 25ml dry vermouth
• apple slice
• Ice

And you'll need to do these things:

Shake everything in a cocktail shaker and then strain into a martini glass. Garnish with the apple slice and ignore anyone who tells you that this isn't a real drink.

Flickr image from *Micky's photostream.