The boy and his poison: The Domestic Spritz

Domestic Sluttery might be drawing to a close this afternoon but the show isn’t over ‘til the sardonic cocktail correspondent sings. Firstly let's celebrate Team DS's occasionally questionable drink tastes. Laura B went for the whisky sour, Caleigh is into a cheeky Godfather and I swooned at Laura H and Frances's gin focused French 75/Bramble conundrum. Gemma made a heartfelt plea for the promise of a decently made Cosmo and Sara championed the Pornstar Martini (it makes one HELL of a shooter).

What about your editor in chief, the original Domestic Slut? It turns out that Sian has a thing for the retro erm... 'classic' – the Piña Colada. She'll help save your Dad’s Christmas present, pick that perfect first date restaurant, find the perfect interior design goodies and make you an incredible sandwich but she still can't choose a classy cocktail. No matter, I’m issuing a ‘pass go and collect £200 worth of pina coladas’ card especially for her; Let's rustle up the coconut cream and get that rum going.

I can’t say goodbye to this amazing blog without a bespoke drink to unite this stylish but disparate crowd. Tonight we shall be drinking more than one Domestic Spritz.

There had to be bubbles. This is something of a bittersweet goodbye so there’s some Aperol and sugar syrup in there too. And what would a summer drink be without some strawberries? I hope I did everyone justice in this final drink and if anyone needs a suave dipsomaniac, I'm @nicksmith on Twitter. Raise a glass and keep it tipsy, everyone.

The Domestic Spritz (makes one, but surely you know how this goes)

You’ll need:

• 5 medium strawberries
• 25ml Aperol
• 25ml Sugar syrup
• Prosecco to top up
• Strawberry to garnish

Make it:

1. Add the strawberries and aperol to a cocktail shaker or something you can bash them to death in
2. Pulp the strawberries. You can do this either in a blender or by pummelling them with a rolling pin in a cocktail shaker
3. Strain the pulp in a sieve
4. Add 25ml of the strained pulp to a champagne glass
5. Add 25ml of sugar syrup to the glass
6. Top up with champagne
7. Garnish with a strawberry
8. Shed a tear in memory of an awesome blog and smile.

The Final Wishlist: Gorgeous things you'll want to buy/read/eat RIGHT NOW

The perfect dinosaur dress. £121 from Polka Dot Polly.

Caleigh: Of all the fashion pieces we've covered, two have caused me to immediately buy their products. This first was Sara's Lady Vintage discovery, the second was Laura B's Polka Dot Polly feature (my bespoke dress will be with me soon!) I absolutely love Hey Sailor! and several of their gorgeous pieces are on my birthday present list. When it comes to recipes, I feel like I met my food spirit animals in Hazel and Alice. Cucumber and red onion pickle got me through my pregnancy, I craved it above all other things. Alice's buttermilk fried chicken is the best thing I've eaten. I wasn't even that fond of fried chicken until I made this. Can I also have her sweetcorn and halloumi fritters, please? There are some weeks when I live on these.

The perfect seafood stew.

Laura B: Recipe-wise, Sian's steak and chorizo chilli is one I come back to time and time again, as is her Spanish seafood stew. I must also mention Sara's Sexy Bovril, though - a recipe that's much-championed by its author, and consistently overlooked (to the amusement of us all behind-the-scenes) in recipe round-ups. She doesn't actually know that it was actually the post that first brought me to DS as a reader all those years ago.

The perfect cartoon bag. £89.95 from Jump from Paper.

As for stuff, I've bought and coveted so much. I've lost count of how often a stranger has admired my Jump from Paper bag. And Sara's Love From Hetty And Dave post alerted me to the existence of Monty the monocled slug draught excluder (he'll be coming to live with me soon), as well as being filled with the sort of clever, funny writing that she and the whole team are so bloody good at. Their witticisms sometimes pop into my head while I'm walking down the street, and make me guffaw anew.

The perfect bikini. £65 from For Luna.

Kat: What I've always loved about DS is how diverse our tastes are. I've been introduced to endless shops I had no idea existed, and subsequently fallen in love with. My For Luna swimsuit is my favourite Sluttery purchase, bought way before I joined the site, and the little boxes of instant comfort made by Kim's Little Monsters are gorgeously charming. And I just bloody adored Calligraphuck's cards because, well, obviously.

The perfect greetings card. £4 from Calligraphuck.

I prefer the internet to printed cookbooks, and DS has been a source of so many happy dinners over the years. My office goes insane whenever I make Sara's malteser tiffin (OMG SO GOOD) and Hazel's hot cross cheesecake has left all my Easter lunch guests in fits of ecstasy, and Alice's incredible slaw is my go to salad for 100% guaranteed tastiness.

The perfect hot cross bun cheesecake.

It has been so hard narrowing down my favourite DS posts, but looking back through the site this week has given me so many happy reminders and made my wishlist of goodies even more of an unwieldy bloody nightmare. Thanks Sluttery girls past and present - you are tasteful, fabulous geniuses, every one.

The perfect statement necklace. £20 from Paisie.

Sara: When Laura B wrote about a unicornicopia of magical delights, I knew we were soul sisters. I'd already suspected this was the case when she told us about shoe clips - an entirely new, untapped area to accessorise. Frances brought us the delights of Paisie and their beautiful sunshine jewellery (and a glitter kitten dress, ie all my favourite things, all at once). And I couldn't go without a shout-out to the much maligned Sexy Bovril: so tragically overlooked in our food round-ups, but surely the best cocktail we've ever brought you.

The perfect gingerbread TARDIS.

Gemma: My favourite ever DS recipes are salt & pepper chicken wings and cheesecake brownies. Both so easy to do, such crowd pleasers. My best stuff is always retro-related but I also loved doing my plus size posts, and loved the conversation that started around a post I wrote about screwing the rules and wearing what you want no matter what size you are. As a bit of a Whovian, the Doctor Who week was one of my favourite moments, we'll never forget the Gingerbread TARDIS.

The perfect dress collaboration. £79 from Coco Fennell with Karen Mabon.

Frances: I must have lived in an empty flat with an empty wardrobe and eaten beans on toast every night before I discovered Domestic Sluttery (one of those is actually still true), as I owe so many purchases to the site. Of all the many, many amazing frocks we’ve featured on the site my all time favourite has to be Coco Fennell. That’s how I want to dress when I grow up, please. And as for her collaboration with Karen Mabon? The stuff of my terribly materialistic dreams.

The perfect Creme Egg cupcakes.

As I’m not a very confident cook (go on, why not check out the one and only recipe I made for the site?), I cannot overstate my admiration enough for the mistresses of the kitchen who write for Domestic Sluttery. All cakes should glow in the dark. All cakes should have hidden sweets. Or hidden cream eggs at the very least. But it’s Sian’s lemon and garlic chicken I’ve probably made the most from the site. And, as from now on, how the hell am I going to know what I want to buy RIGHT NOW without the Friday wishlist telling me so?

The perfect rolling pin. £24.43 from Valek.

Laura H: I have record store shop syndrome: my mind has gone blank as soon as I try and think of one favourite Domestic Sluttery post, so here are a few that spring to mind. Glasgow boutique La La Land kept me stocked with present ideas for MONTHS. Includes healthy dose of Ryan Gosling. I'm now officially obsessed with dinosaur embossed Valek Rolling Pins, too. 

The perfect whisky cocktail.

Since I'm vegetarian, I can't resist the lure of Sara's beautiful Laska (look at it!) while This Five Minute Ice Cream is pure alchemy genius (if you haven't tried it, WHY NOT?) You can be guaranteed to find me whiling away these long, hot Gatsby days with The Boy and his Poison's Whiskey Daisy and lusting after everything by Coco Fennell.

The perfect muesli bars.

Katie: This recipe for no bake chocolate ginger muesli bites ticks all my boxes. I also regularly go back our top ten ginger recipes especially around Christmas time when I just want ginger in everything. Make sure you try Laura B's gingerbread mug house recipe complete with handy, downloadable template. Oh, the results are amusing when you've not used any maths!

The perfect cave hotels.

I actually studied archaeology at university, which makes me want to put any of these cave hotels at the top of my holiday wish-list.

The (practically) perfect book. £11.99 from Amazon.

I also have to mention the Domestic Sluttery book. I wasn't part of the team when the book was published, but it never leaves my bedside table. It's perfect for that period before you're going to bed, when you know you're supposed to be off your laptop or iPad because of all that blue-light-stopping-you-sleep jazz, but you really want to browse through some lovely, inspirational blog posts. And this is it really, but in a book. I dip in and out of it again and again and buy it for every teenager I know because I bloody wish I'd had it when I was 18.

The perfect holiday location.. From £195 per night.

Nick: Let's keep this short and sweet. The Boathouse in The Lake District. It's probably the best holiday I've ever been on and a return trip will forever be at the top on my wishlist.

The perfect Hendrick's gin sorbet.

Sian: Picking my favourite Domestic Sluttery posts is like choosing a favourite child (obviously you pick the cutest, right?) but there are some that definitely stand out. Our Hendrick's gin sorbet, obviously. Our drunken spaghetti for being why-didn't-we-think-of-that-before genius and Kat's adventures with ginger soup, for all the wrong reasons. Our recent feature on unusual museums went all around the UK uncovering some brilliant gems and our Ginterview with the inimitable Pip McCormac is wonderful. He's scared of cats and thinks Spice World is a Christmas film.

The perfect art project. Wonderland by Yoendoo Jung.

My absolute favourite ever piece, is from all the way back in 2009. It's a design piece about Korean artist Yeondoo Jung, who turns children's drawings into photography. I loved that project so much and it was the moment when there was a noticeable turning point in the site and we became more about design than 'pretty stuff'.

The perfect cup and saucer. £100 from Richard Brendon.

And there's just time for some last minute favourites. I've made so many brilliant design discoveries since starting the site, but special mentions must go to Rachel Boston, Richard Brendon and Chloe Croft. I will remain forever in awe of their talent, which is really what Domestic Sluttery has been about.

Come on, it's your turn to take a trip down memory lane. Dive into those archives and tell us: what's your favourite ever Domestic Sluttery piece?

Let Her Eat Cake: Black Forest Gateau Cake

I was looking back through some of the amazing Domestic Sluttery cakey posts over the years (whilst cramming my face with cake and sobbing along to All By Myself) and was shocked, nay, DISMAYED to discover that the pinnacle of 80s desserts, the black forest gateau, had only featured in cookie form. We simply couldn't leave without honouring the kitschiest of puddings.

This is a beast of a cake. Two layers of vanilla sponge, two layers of kirsch-soaked chocolate cake, kirsch-and-jam-laden-fresh cherries, whipped cream, oh, and a dark chocolate cherry ganache as well. It's a beast of epic proportions and the final cake recipe. I will miss everything about DS, but the people most of all, so do come and say hello over @esthercrumpet or at esthercrumpet.tumblr.com.

Black Forest Gateau Cake (serves absolutely everybody you know)
Preparation time: 2-3 hours
Baking time: 1 hour (for both cakes)

You will need:
The vanilla batter:

• 400g butter, softened
• 400g caster sugar
• 4 free-range eggs
• 400g self-raising flour
• Seeds from 1 vanilla pod (or 1 tsp vanilla extract)
• 25ml milk

For the chocolate batter:

• 150g good quality dark chocolate
• 3 heaped tbsp cocoa powder
• 175g butter
• 4 free-range eggs
• 300g caster sugar
• 3 tbsp kirsch or cherry brandy
• 175g self-raising flour
• 1/2 tsp baking soda
• 3 tbsp plain or Greek yoghurt 

For the dark chocolate ganache:

• 200g good quality dark chocolate
• 280ml double cream
• 2 tbsp kirsch or cherry brandy

For the filling and decoration:

• 200g fresh cherries, stoned
• 5 tbsp berry jam
• 3 tbsp kirsch

To decorate:

• 600ml double cream
• 1 tbsp icing sugar
• A few drops of vanilla extract / seeds from a vanilla pod
• White chocolate fingers
• Fresh cherries

Make it!
The vanilla layers:

1. Preheat the oven to 180C / 350F / Gas Mark 4. Grease and line four cake tins: I used 23cm one, a 22cm one, a 20cm one and an 18cm one. 
2. Cream together the butter and sugar until light and fluffy.
3. Add the eggs one at a time, with a tablespoon of the flour and beat well. Repeat with rest of the eggs, beating well in between. 
4. Stir in the vanilla.
5. Add the rest of the flour in thirds, folding in lightly in between until it is just incorporated and no streaks are showing.
6. Add the milk in splashes, so that the cake has a dropping texture. (You might not need all of it).
7. Dollop into the largest and second smallest tin (the 1st and the 3rd, counting from the bottom). 
8. Smooth over the top and bake for around 35-40 minutes, or until it's golden and risen, and a skewer inserted comes out clean.
9. Cool in the tin for a few minutes, before turning out to cool on a wire rack.

The chocolate layers:

1. Chop the chocolate roughly and place in a large bowl with the cocoa powder. 
2. In a small saucepan, melt the butter. 
3. Pour the butter over the chocolate and cocoa, stirring until smooth and combined. (Give it a 10 second blast in the microwave if it hasn't all melted)
4. In a separate bowl, whisk together the eggs and caster sugar, then pour into the chocolate mixture and stir until well combined. Add the kirsch.
5. Gently fold in the flour and baking soda, the stir in the yoghurt.
6. Spoon into the cake tins and bake for 35-40 minutes. Allow to cool in the tins for a few minutes.
7. Poke a few holes in the still warm cakes with a skewer, and drizzle over a few tablespoons of kirsch. 

The dark chocolate ganache:

1. While the second lot of cakes are cooking, break the dark chocolate in small chunks and place in a bowl.
2. Place the cream in a small saucepan and heat gently until it is almost at boiling point.
3. Pour over the chocolate, stirring well until all the lumps have dissolved. 
4. Add another tablespoon of kirsch here, if you want your cake extra boozy. You probably do. 
5. Cover and set aside to cool. 

The cherry filling:

1. Throw the cherries, jam and kirsch in a small saucepan and set over a low heat. 
2. Cook for 8-10 minutes, stirring occasionally, until reduced and sticky. Set aside.

CAKE MAKERS, ASSEMBLE:

1. Place the cream, icing sugar and vanilla in a bowl and whip until it reaches a stiff-ish, spreadable consistency. 
2. Spread the bottom cake (vanilla) with a layer of the cherry filling, then spoon over a 1/4 of the ganache and finally a 1/4 of the cream. Sandwich the next layer (chocolate) and repeat the process until you have a TOWER of delicious. 
3. Use the remaining cream to lightly frost the sides of the cake, to catch any crumbs. 
4. Use white chocolate fingers to line the sides of the cake, before decorating the top with fresh cherries. 
5. Eat in huge slices whilst sobbing loudly and unashamedly to our karaoke favourite, the 1984 Foreigner classic 'I wanna know what love isssss...'

Sluttishly Sweet: Our All-Time Favourite Desserts

Darling readers, you must all be the size of houses now given the amount of dessert recipes we've thrown at you over the years. For those of you who can still fit through your kitchen door, here's a round-up of the very best of the last five years.

In my trawl through the archives, the word that came up most often was 'boozy'. Chocolate whisky custard doesn't just have to come out for Burns Night, and boozy rhubarb and ginger trifle isn't just for Christmas. Boozy chocolate fudge trifle is suspiciously simple - to make and eat - as are mulled pears.

Sorry, have we broken you? Have some hangover French toast.

My god, we loved a tart, be it Bakewell, custard, walnut and maple syrup, or a very simple pear. We branched out into tarte tatins - take your pick from peach and vanilla or apple and pear.

At our most sluttish, we made things you don't even have to bake, like our chocolate ginger muesli bites, no cook fudge, or this mille crêpes no bake cake (which is just 20 pancakes, not actually 1000. Calm down).

We made our own versions (albeit often more decadent) of existing puds, like walnut whips with brandy - we really did love adding booze - Toblerone delight, dippy egg and soldiers (SPOILER: actually chocolate mousse and shortbread) and, of course, cronuts.

And we were waaaay ahead of the Commonwealth Games curve when we gave Tunnocks teacakes the ultimate treatment: we deep-fried them.

Remember our ginger chocolate pots? They got a mention in the national press way back in 2010 and we all had conniption fits with excitement.

Caranutter pie. Caleigh dreamed it. It's beautiful.

Rose and pistachio kulfi. Better than ice-cream.

Raspberry, rose and pistachio vacherin. What even is a vacherin? Doesn't matter. Look at it. LOOK AT IT.

Café bombón panna cotta - looks like a drink, actually a dessert. Perfect to finish a meal...

 ... and a perfect way to finish this post. I can't believe I won't be back to write about unicorns  / cakes / kittens / shiny things / bits of ribbon, etc, but looking at what we've created over the years makes me very proud. I've had four years of joy writing for Domestic Sluttery, which isn't bad seeing as after Sian gave me the job and told me I'd have to do a recipe a week, I very nearly backed out immediately. THE RECIPE THING WASN'T IN THE JOB DESCRIPTION, SIAN.

Anyway, it's properly thrilled me every time someone has made one of my recipes or bought something from a tiny independent shop I've recommended, so thank you if you did. Do keep in touch on Twitter or I'll be ever so cross.

Our Top Cake Recipes

Cake. Chocolate cake, fruity cake, boozy cake, fancy cake. We love cake. All cake. Trying to round up our all-time favourite cakes from over five years of DS cake-appreciation is a little like trying to pick your favourite child or choosing between gin, unicorns or cats. Just for you, though, we've done it. So, grab your mixing bowls and prepare yourself for a marathon baking session!

Whether you need a quick and simple chocolate cake or something more on the triple chocolate fudge lines, we've got you covered. You don't even need a well stocked cupboard or much baking equipment to bake a brilliant celebration cake.

As well as the tried and tested pairings of chilli and chocolate and chocolate with orange, we've added cinnamon, mulled wine and passion fruit to our choccy cakes.

Chocolate and nuts are best of friends, and chocolate chestnut cake is a great place to start. Our pecan brownie pie is a seriously wonderful invention, while this Daim Bar truffle cake is rich and indulgent - you simply have to try it. Oh, and all three of these cakes are gluten free!

Take chocolate, add booze: everyone's happy. Tiramisu cake takes both those things and adds coffee and cream. Prefer white chocolate? Try our limoncello loaf cake.

If you've ever had that, "is it a cake, or is it really a biscuit?" conversation, this giant jaffa cake will settle the argument. Definitely a cake. A boozy, wobbly, delicious cake.

Yes, we'll put booze in all kinds of cake. Brandy goes well in toffee apple cake, but rum suits carrot cake better.

In spite of Nick's best efforts, we seem to gravitate towards big fruity cocktails, preferably ones with paper umbrellas and sparkly bits on the straws. Piña colada is one of our favourite cocktails, the cake is pretty awesome, too. And then there's the fabulous Mojito cake! It's one of the most popular recipes we've ever featured, for damn good reason.

Pimm's is the most summery of all the fruity cocktails, and we love our Pimm's cake just as much. Ever tried a Love on the Run? Our cake version is just gorgeous

Hello, raspberry liqueur, you sexy thing. Our raspberry Revenge cake is a brilliant way to use your Chambord. If you're on the wagon, get your raspberry fix from this pink lemonade cake instead.

Berry Pavlova cake. Need I say more?

Cheesecake counts as cake, right? It's baked and it has the word 'cake' right in there in the title after all. We've got hot cross, white chocolate and gluten free Crunchie baked cheesecakes, all for you.

Cheesecake brownies combine two of our favourite things, so do Snickers brownies and after dinner mint brownies for that matter. Go dairy free with our chocolate cherry brownies, gluten free with s'mores brownies, or eschew chocolate altogether with lavender and caramel brownies.

Lavender is a beautifully delicate addition to a cake, it pairs rather well with lemon. For more floral flavour, try orange blossom cake.

By now, you'll need a break from the oven. Never fear! Malteser chocolate tiffin and no-bake birthday cake will sort out your cake cravings without raising the temperature of your kitchen. If your kitchen is already too hot, out Twister ice cream cake will cool you down.

If you need cake in a hurry, you need emergency cake. Our coconut and raspberry microwave cake is ready in minutes. So's our emergency mug cake and it has a surprise orangey centre.

We love a surprise centre in our cakes. Salted caramel inside chocolate cakes, custard inside vanilla and brandy cakes are just how we roll. If cupcakes are too small fry, go big with our sweet filled piñata cake. 

We'll even hide exciting layers and shapes inside our cakes. From shade of pink in our fetch Mean Girls cake to a unicorn in a humble loaf cake, we've enjoyed surprising you.

Phew! Let's finish with something big, boozy and unashamedly naked.