Sluttishly Sweet: Festive Coconut Ice

Ok. It's ruddy bloody freezing. Everyone is unnervingly festive and the queues at Tescos are already obscene. The festive season is OFFICIALLY upon us. So, for a brief moment, whilst I stood bewildered amid the throngs of shoppers in Tescos last night I took a stand. Sod this, I thought. I'm going home. So, I did.

Following my festive face-off I wandered the drizzly car park in search of my car, spent an age-and-a-half escaping the town and retreated back to my little cliff-top paradise. Only to find that SERIOUS festivity had been at work during my absence. Sooo ... tree erected, tacky frieze atop the piano well under way and presents in abundance appearing from hidden cupboards and wardrobes, it all became a bit much.

To quell the rising fear that I hadn't bought all my presents and the knowledge that Christmas is practically DAYS away; I took to my kitchen for some solace. But, alas, it was too late.

Festive fever had hunted me down and cornered me like a timid deer. I was scuppered. It was too late for me. There was only one thing for it ...

To make some seriously über-festive coconut ice.

You'll need:

100g condensed milk
115g icing sugar
85g desiccated coconut
Red, blue and yellow food colouring

Make it!

1. Sift the icing sugar and mix with the condensed milk and coconut. Your mixture is going to be pretty stiff (ooh matron!)

2. Separate the mixture into two halves. With one half add a little red colouring and blend. Add a little more until you've got a nice vibrant red.

3. Take the other half of the mixture and add a teeny drop of blue colouring and twice that of yellow. Blend it and keep tweaking until you have a suitably festive green!

4. Double line a loaf tin and lay the green mixture evenly along the bottom. Lay the red mixture on top.

5. Leave the mixture for about 3 hours to get nice and firm.

6. Once set, slice into wee squares and devour!

Awash with even more festive cheer bestowed upon me by my incredibly over-excited boyf (who'd've thought that a few baubles and some twinkly lights could reduce a grown man to an over-excited boy?) we enjoyed my mini-festive treats whilst listening to Wham's Last Christmas. Nothing like a touch of the super-sweet of a December evening, don't you think?