Friday, 7 June 2013

Sluttery Sales Spy: Office, People Tree & Oasis



The sales have got their hats on*, and they're coming out to play! Won't you join them?

* DISCLAIMER: There will be no hats featured here today. Sorry. Mainly because I couldn't prise them from the sales' heads. 

THE DRESSES

Glasses print dress, £20 (was £40), Oasis

SPECS APPEAL! Oasis continues its run of excellent prints with this fabulous explosion of glasses. They claim it can be worn two ways - the traditional halter-neck way, or wrapped around your throat in some sort of weird criss-crossy configuration that makes the model look like she didn't know what a halter-neck was. Don't do that. Just wear it properly. It's time for your boobulars to get an airing now, anyway.

Essie button dress, £45.50 (was £65), People Tree

Oh, look - she's painting. Interesting that she's chosen to wear her new People Tree frock for the task, but I suppose she hasn't actually paid for it yet, so this sort of devil-may-care attitude is to be expected. But what is she painting? I've had a closer look, and it appears to be a naked lady with a very vague bottom and defined popliteal fossae. So, you know, if you're about to start a similar magnum opus, here's your outfit! 

Let's study the umbrella print, shall we?:


Take that, British summer! You'll be ready for anything in this.

Poker-faced dress, £59.95 (was £118), Anthropologie

Argh! Bodiless faces! I love this print by artist Leah Reena Goren, used to great effect here on Anthropologie's Poker-faced dress. I could look at it for hours. I've already spotted Charles II, several members of Supergrass, the kid who ruined Keira Knightley's life in Antonement, and Myra Hindley. I'd probably pass on that particular dinner party, if I'm honest.

THE WEDGES

Messeca Carlie wedges, £62 (was £141), ASOS

These purple suede shoes make my heart go tickety-boom. They're like the beautiful love children of Prince and Elvis.


I do enjoy a chunky, clunky sandal. They're the human equivalent of the bell on a cat's collar, aren't they? EVERYONE knows you're coming. You're like a one-woman earthquake. These Forest wedges from Office are presumably so named because an entire forest has gone into making their soles. Feel fleetingly sorry for the trees, if you must. But it's reincarnation, innit? Yeah.


Even though I love everything I write about here, I obviously can't buy it all. That would be greedy. These Fleur wedges from Office, though - they must be mine. OH LOOK, my size has sold out. FML. 

THE SUNGLASSES

Quay Bat sunglasses, £28.40 (was £40.50), Fab

Oops - looks like the Props Department from Dame Edna Everage: The Cartoon* forgot to pack up these beauties. Quick, buy them before they discover their mistake!

* Not a thing. Should definitely be a thing, though.

Square retro sunglasses, £6.50 (was £12), ASOS

I don't think my face would appreciate these angular sunglasses from ASOS. If your face is less of an ingrate, lucky you.

Jeepers Peepers Isabella pearl sunglasses, £13.80 (was £17.10), Fab

I ADORE these Jeepers Peepers Isabella sunglasses. And because sunglasses are an equal opportunities accessory, these actually will be mine. No sold-out sizes here to stymie my shopping. HA.

*Triumphant Face*

5 comments:

  1. Popliteal fossa! What a lovely phrase! I had to google it, but now I know. (It's the back of the knee joint). I hope I shall remember it forever.

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    Replies
    1. It's nice, isn't it? Just call to mind the painting lady in the umbrella dress and you'll never forget it!

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  2. Oh my gosh, those Jeepers Peepers sunglasses! I need them in my life so badly! But alas, sunglasses aren't truly an equal opportunist - they're not so practical for us normal glasses wearers. I'd need contacts to just buy off-the-rack sunglasses, but daily disposable contacts don't sufficiently improve my eyesight =(

    heartattack-andwine.blogspot.co.uk

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Oops, you're right, Katy - they're not really an equal opportunities accessory at all, are they? I say buy them and display them as an objet d'art instead!

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    2. But! The Jeepers Peepers vintage range is available with bi-focals. Not suitable for everyone, but if you only need a pair of readers then you're sorted.

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