Friday, 30 August 2013

Sluttery Sales Spy: Warehouse, Poetic Licence & Mango



It's time to open up that payslip and pour the contents all over these little lovelies! 

That's how money works, right?

THE DRESSES

Max C bow collar dress, £28 (was £53), ASOS

On closer inspection, this Max C dress reveals tiny palaces, trees, and things that look like a pegasus/flamingo/ballet dancer tribrid. What's not to love? I for one have yearned for a dress depicting these strange, curious creatures. Also: big fuck-off bows are always a winner.

Feather dress, £30 (was £46), Warehouse

I feel like I might have shown you this feather print dress from Warehouse before. I'm nothing if not consistent. But actually, I think it's more likely that I've just been staring at it for weeks, thinking how much I would like to be covered in monochrome feathers, without the hassle and bad reputation that comes with being a lone magpie.

THE JEWELLERY

Yasmin by Gogo Philip Explosion necklace, £7 (was £20), ASOS

What a pretty explosion. This Yasmin by Gogo Philip necklace looks so smooth and strokeable, doesn't it? Like a worry bead. If you zoom in on this photo, you can see the reflection of the photographer's feet, which alerts us to the fact that the necklace can also be used as an emergency mirror. Well done, that snapper. You've uncovered a whole new design feature.

Raul P for Gorjana paperclip cuff, £60 (was £138), ASOS

Have you ever, like me, thought that the world would be a more beautiful and practical place if more jewellery was fashioned out of giant paperclips? Good news! This Raul P bloke thinks the same, and he's made a big ol' cuff out of this paperclip he found at the bottom of his filing cabinet. There's a ring and a necklace, too, if you fancy going all-out with your stationery style. I don't know what Raul P's going to clip his papers with now, but he should have thought about that before he started this shenanigan. 

FACT FANS: the French word for paperclip is 'trombone'! The French word for trombone is also 'trombone'. Could be confusing.

THE BAGS

Nica laptop bag, £29.99 (was £55), TK Maxx

I think it's time I stopped wrapping my laptop and other assorted gadgets in a jumper and stuffing them into my handbag with all the other crap I carry about in there, which as ever includes Hilary Devey and Derren Brown (sidenote: they are not crap; everything else in there is). Conditions are getting a bit cramped, I'll admit, and I don't want to be reported to the RSPCITVE (Royal Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Illusionists and Television Entrepreneurs). Plus, one of them might spill their morning cuppa onto my electricals. 

Nope, it's time to invest in a dedicated gadget bag, and this Nica beaut from TK Maxx is perfect.

Patent shoulder bag, £14.99 (was £29.99), Mango

There's still time to squeeze the last drops of summer into your bag (now that we've moved the expensive gadgets elsewhere) - and this patent shoulder bag from Mango is 50% sunshine, 50% shine, and 50% off. Wait. Maths isn't my strong point. 

THE SHOES

Elite Goby newspaper shoes, £31.60 (was £82.70), Fab

READ ALL ABOUT IT! Forgotten your book on your morning commute? You won't have to stare despondently at your feet if you're wearing a pair of these Elite Goby newspaper shoes from Fab - you'll be able to read them instead!

Poetic Licence The One heels, £29.50 (was £99.99), Irregular Choice Outlet

I've been moseying around the Irregular Choice outlet again, kids, but don't worry - Chuckles the gnome isn't making an appearance. This time, I've opted for the much more sedate (?) The One heels from their little sister brand, Poetic Licence. We're working to my definition of sedate here, by the way, which means green suede, mock croc, orange piping, big felt flowers and a bit of braiding. Anyway, you should buy them. They'll make your feet look fun and your legs look as long as the A9 (maybe slightly less bendy). 

I told you there would be games this week, didn't I? Let's pretend I didn't. Next week there will be games. 

Ahem.

1 comment:

  1. As much as I love many of these things, comparing legs to the A9 is absolutely my favourite bit of this piece!

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