"For never was there a tale of more woe
Than that of Julienne, and that time I cut my bloody thumbnail off chopping carrots"
As much as I am bad at chopping, I really enjoy it. You need a good surface and a good knife and speed, and above all, I love a good novelty chopping board. Who doesn't? Strange people, that's who.
This one, from Sluttery favourite The Literary Gift Company, is one of the best I've seen in a very long time.
The pun! Perfect. The board! Excellent. It's shaped like a book! Superb. It's £14.95! Bloody bargain.
You can hide it in your bookcase! Er, ok, but that doesn't sound particularly hygienic.
You could (and I will) just call it a chopping bard. Incidentally, did you know that to bard something means to tie bacon or other fat around something to stop it getting dry while roasting? Because you do now.
Domestic Sluttery's Shakespearean line*:
- Much Ado About Muffins
- Taters Andronicus
- Julius Seasoning
- Two Gentlemen of Vanilla
- A Midsummer Night's Tureen
- Macbroth
- As You Pikelet
- The Tempestle and Mortar
- Simmerline (range of saucepans)
- Love's Flavour's Lost (when you've made a colossal cooking mistake)
Yes. I want this range to happen so much.
ReplyDeleteThe Tampering of the Stew?
SUPERB! Shequeen on Twitter has just nailed it beyond anything I can possibly dream of with Henry Gas Mark IV.
DeleteYES. Such joy!
DeleteThat's the best one!
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ReplyDeleteKing John Dory!
ReplyDeleteJulius Caesar Salad (too obvious?)
Medium or well done? As You Like It.
I've run out. And these aren't very good.
The Merry Chives of Windsor.
ReplyDeletePilchard III
ReplyDelete